Loving Silence and Solitude: The Desert as a Place of Loneliness and Kindness
Matthew 4:1-11 & Luke 5:15-16;
This week, our Lenten journey has led us to the spiritual practice of silence and solitude. In our hectic, fast-paced, media-frenzied culture, both silence and solitude can feel almost impossible. Yet we see in the example of Jesus, who “often withdrew to lonely places and prayed” (Luke 5:16), that this practice has an important role to play in our spiritual formation. Jesus prayed in solitude all the time throughout the Gospels; this alone is enough to suggest we ought to try it! We see Jesus pray with particular fervency when he is making big decisions regarding his mission and seeking direction from his Father. We also see him led into the wilderness to be tempted by the devil, battling the forces of evil and emerging from the desert victorious and filled with the spirit.
Author and priest Henri Nouwen describes silence and solitude as “the furnace of transformation”. Just as Jesus regularly withdrew to pray alone, we too must seek our own spaces of silence – coming face to face with our creator and embracing the renewal of our hearts and minds as we offer ourselves completely in prayer. Henri Nouwen puts it like this: “Solitude… is the place where Christ remodels us in his own image and frees us from the victimising compulsions of the world.”
Seeking silence and solitude may feel like swimming against the tide of our culture, yet we see from the example of the Desert Fathers and Mothers that fighting against the prevailing trends of society is sometimes necessary in our pursuit of life with God. What would it look like to prioritise silence in our noisy world? What would it look like to pursue solitude when we are constantly accessible via modern technology? In today’s sermon we will explore this practice through the lens of Jesus in the Gospels and the Desert Fathers and Mothers, aiming to inspire reflection and transformation in our congregation, ultimately challenging us to take some small steps this week towards a regular practice of silence and solitude.
At the start of our Lent series, Graham mentioned St. Anthony, one of the first Desert Fathers who sought out silence and solitude to draw closer to God. Such was his longing for God that he spent 20 years in isolation in the desert of Egypt. When he left he took his solitude with him and shared it with all who came to him… He had become so Christlike, so radiant with God’s love, that his entire being was his ministry.
Anyone fancy an extended period of silence?
We live in a very loud and busy world. We are constantly bombarded with noise. You might think I don’t live in a big town or city. Our village is so quiet! Plus, good double glazing keeps all the noise out! That might be true, but you’ll be mistaken for thinking all is quiet. In our modern, high-tech society we’re never far from noise of one sort or another. Think for example of how much time we might spend on social media – scrolling, browsing, listening to music, videos etc. Of course, none of this is bad in and of itself. But the trouble is we get so drawn into it that we don’t have time for stillness and quiet.
So what are we to do? How do we begin to make time and space for silence and solitude? Where do we begin?
There’s no better place to begin than by looking at the example of Jesus who often sent off to be alone with God the Father. This was really important to Jesus and should be for us too.
In our bible readings, we see how Jesus began his ministry in silence and solitude – led by the Spirit in the wilderness for 40 days and nights – and sustained his ministry by often withdrawing to lonely places to pray. Jesus was intentional about this because he knew it was important for his spiritual life.
A really important thing to notice in the reading from Matthew is that Jesus didn’t just withdraw to be alone (as helpful as that can be), but specifically to pray. I’m sure we all like a bit of peace and quiet from time to time, and I’m sure you go somewhere you can just have that time to yourself. But that is not what Jesus did. He spent time in prayer – talking to God the Father and listening to him. It was a two-way process. So, what can we learn from Jesus?
Let me highlight three things for us to think about.
Firstly, we have to be deliberate about making space for silence and prayer. Its not going to just happen. We need to plan it; put it in the diary!
Secondly, the thing is that silence and solitude is not a personality trait for introverts only but is an essential spiritual practice for all personality types and dispositions. We can all engage with it.
And finally, Silence and solitude as a spiritual practice is really helpful and valuable because it enables us to see more clearly and be seen more clearly.
Jesus, along with many biblical heroes like David, Moses, Elijah, Joseph, Paul and others found periods of solitude to be the most constructive times in their lives and ministries. In fact the Bible displays solitude, often in the form of the wilderness, as one of the primary places of transformation. It is quite remarkable that Jesus was led into the wilderness by the Spirit (Matthew 4:1). I wonder if you’ve noticed that before.
Spending time alone with God is so helpful because it gives the Holy Spirit time and space to do deep work, while removing the other noises, pressures, expectations and distractions that draw our attention away from God.
In the quiet, we often come face to face with the truth of the distorted beliefs, temptations and motives inside ourselves. Its an opportunity to allow God to help expose and remove these things from our lives.
In the noise and busyness of the world, it can be easy to ignore, distract and numb ourselves from the truth of what lies inside. But nothing is hidden from God. And so time spent alone with God reminds us that he sees everything – warts and all. And yet, he loves us so very much.
In silence and solitude, we invite God to bring transformation to hearts and minds; to help us re-order our lives in such a way that it enables us to thrive and be all that God wants us to be. It’s a place to be reminded that we are God’s dearly beloved children. His word tells us that we are they apple of his eye; that he rejoices over us with singing. Spending time alone with God helps us to focus on his amazing love for us.
The more we do it the more we realize that we don’t need to earn his love and approval. We don’t need to pretend to be something we’re not. We begin to let go of the pressures and expectations of the world and instead we grow more into the likeness of Jesus, our Saviour.
Of course this takes time. We can’t rush it. We can’t expect to sit in silence for half an hour and expect everything to be sorted. Silence and solitude is not something you order on Amazon for Prime next day delivery! It’s not something we ‘click-and-collect’!
Remember I mentioned the desert Father Anthony earlier and how he spent 20 years in silence. Wow! I’m sure it must have taken him a while to inhabit silence. Well, you’ll be pleased to hear that I’m not suggesting we all become hermits and lock ourselves away from society and our loved ones for years on end.
The thing to remember is building a regular rhythm of silence and solitude is a slow process. It takes time to establish it as a regular habit. It’s also worth mentioning that we mustn’t treat this as a ‘task’ that we need to achieve. Because we live in world that’s so driven by immediate results, where almost everything is available at the click of a button, it can often feel difficult and unfruitful when we engage with being still and alone with God to begin with.
But don’t let that discourage you. Don’t let it put you off. The goal is to build rhythms where we often detach and practise silence and solitude before God. Do it in small chunks. Over time, these experiences will become easier and more fruitful. Think of it like practising to run a marathon and you won’t be disappointed.
Let me close with some practical suggestions of how you might start building times of silence into your daily routines:
- Choose not to look at your phone first thing in the morning as you’re sipping your tea/coffee/protein shake this week!
- Make an appointment with God this week. Put it in your diary but resist the urge to fill the time and use this window to try silence and solitude.
- Take a walk/sit in a comfy chair by the window without listening to music or a podcast. Light a candle if that helps you to focus.
- Practise breath prayers for a few minutes every day: simply choose a word or phrase such as Abba (breath in) I belong to you (breath out), and repeat it in time with your breath as a way to keep your mind focused.
- If you’re driving/commuting to and from work, don’t put music on.
These are just a few suggestions. You might think of others. Key thing is start small, stick with it and pray and ask God to help you.
Amen.