By the Revd Colin Hurford
Acts 10.34-43
Isaiah 25.6-9
Mark 16.1-8
I remember, many years ago, thinking that belief in the resurrection was a bit unfair for us compared with the disciples. The disciples actually saw their risen Lord - he talked with them, ate with them - even shared breakfast with them. It was easy for them to believe compared with us who haven’t seen Jesus. True there is plenty of evidence for the truth of the resurrection but in the last resort we have to make an act of faith. And that is emphasised many times in our Communion Service - just two examples: “We believe in one Lord Jesus Christ” and later on “On the third day he rose again”. And then in the Eucharistic Prayer, “Christ has died, Christ is risen, Christ will come again”. An act of faith compared with the disciples’ actual experience. But then I thought of what the disciples had to go through before they could believe.
This Good Friday, I tried to imagine what they must have experienced. I thought of one of my tutors who taught me well and whom I greatly admired and imagined what I would have felt to see him go through the kind of suffering Jesus went through. Staggering through the streets with a crown of thorns on his head and struggling to carry a cross until the weight was taken off his shoulders by a stranger - spread out on the cross, nails hammered into his wrists - it was so painful and horrifying that I had to give up. But that is what the disciples saw. In addition they had to face the guilt of running away when he was arrested and the dashing of all their hopes of the Kingdom of God being established. (They still thought the Kingdom of God as an earthly kingdom.) We are not told if any of the disciples apart from John witnessed what was actually happening but it is probable some dared to join the crowds and even if they did not, they knew what a crucifixion was like. So they very definitely needed actually to see the risen Lord and to experience in a tangible way, his presence, in order for them to know beyond all doubt that Jesus had risen.
So to turn back to the resurrection. If you are the sort of person who can imagine things or are accustomed to meditation, then do spend twenty minutes seeing yourself as one of those disciples in the upper room or one of the two Marys or Salome who went to the tomb on the first Easter Day. What would you feel and think as the events unfolded? If you choose one of the disciples, what would you think when the women came back with the story of the empty tomb, when John and Peter come rushing back with the same story? And when you are gathered in the upper room with the doors locked and the room full of nervous tension and the fear “Will they come for us too?” What would you feel when Jesus suddenly appears?
Dorothy Sayers in her wonderful radio play, ‘Man Born to be King’ pictures the scene with the disciples in the upper room. She imagines, quite plausibly, that the two disciples on the road to Emmaus are husband and wife, his wife being called Mary. This is how it goes: The disciples have been discussing what they have heard, the story of the women who went to the tomb, the appearance to Mary and Peter. Now I’m quoting from the play: ‘there is a knocking on the door, “They’ve come for us”., says Andrew. James goes to the door, “Who is it?” From outside comes the answer “Cleopas and Mary”. “Wait a moment,” says James, “We thought you were the police.” He unlocks the door and the two come in, Cleopas, full of excitement saying: “James, John - everybody! We’ve seen the Master!”. And they tell their story. But still the disciples are not convinced. Matthew exclaims, “It’s frightening”: Philip “It’s a phantom”. Then Jesus suddenly appears with the words, “Peace be unto you.” Philip’s reaction is, with a terrified gasp, “It’s here!” Andrew exclaims “Heaven deliver us”: Matthew, “Lord have mercy on us” and Andrew, “Blessed angels protect us”. Then Jesus speaks to them, “Children, what are you afraid of? Why do you doubt?” And so the play continues with the scene in the Upper Room. So gradually the disciples realise that their beloved Lord and Master really has come back to them from the dead. And, as John writes in his Gospel, ‘they rejoice.’ They are filled with joy.
Dorothy Sayers suggests by her play that the first reaction of the disciples is fear. And fear is at the ending of St. Mark’s Gospel. St. Mark ends his Gospel with the words “They said nothing to anyone for they were afraid!” The other two endings of St. Mark, printed in your bibles were clearly written later, probably by scribes who couldn’t accept such a crude ending to the Gospel. The words, “For they were afraid” in the original Greek, are even more abrupt and compelling than the English translation. Scholars have spent much time debating, “Was the end of the manuscript torn off?” Did Mark die of a heart attack or was he arrested before he could finish his Gospel? I believe, along with many scholars, that Mark intended that to be the ending. For the proper first reaction to the resurrection is fear, fear at such an incredible, almost unbelievable and wondrous event. Who is this God who brings back his Son from the dead?
We might today, and I think we should, substitute the word “fear” with “awe”. Our first reaction to the resurrection must be a deep sense of awe. It is incredible - it changes our lives - it gives our world a meaning and a purpose - it is staggering and it vindicates all that Jesus has taught and shown us. It is a new beginning. But then should come, along with the disciples, a deep sense of joy, the one in whom we have put our faith, the one whom we are following, is alive and with us.
Can we really feel a sense of awe and joy? I believe we can and sometimes, in moments of quiet prayer, I have had this sense of the presence of Jesus and the feeling, how wonderful this time is. I must admit, it does not come often, but when we try to follow Jesus, he does make his risen presence known to us. So we can pray
“Lord Jesus, what a wonderful awe inspiring faith we have. Thank you so much for calling us to believe in you who are always with us. Amen.”